Everyone has good days and bad days. Some have them at different extremes. There are times I am just angry. I have no patience, everyone is stupid, everyone is in my way, nothing is good. I think those are times I look at where I am and where I could have been.
I talk about the ‘bottom falling out’. For me that’s when the illness hit, like a kick in the head from nowhere.
Now, I just want peace and quiet and privacy. It’s probably the worse thing that could happen to me, since there are times I don’t even trust my own mind. But the simplification of my life is what I am aiming for, nothing else.
I’ve reached the point where I no longer offer advice to the same person, with the same problem and we’ve discussed this problem numerous times and they don’t take any of my advice, yet complain about their situation. Not to say I know it all. But if you bother to ask… Why waste my breath and mental power on someone who obviously is seeking just to hear themselves talk and have an audience.
Or those who aren’t willing to put in the work to be mentally healthy, but want you to accept their behavior.
Listen, I told you what I’ve learned thru experience. I’m not pulling this out of my ass, I’ve lived it. Either give it a damn honest try or LEAVE ME ALONE.
I need all my energy, just to make it thru the day. Too keep myself ‘stable’. I need to simplify.
I’ve ended one drama destructive friendship. And they were clueless as to why I could no longer deal with the over reacting and the obsessiveness and the competitive attitude towards me. I’d had enough. Too emotionally draining, I would leave phone calls with this person and have a migraine. I can’t think for myself and someone else, especially when they are suppose to be an adult.
So, needless to say, I am in a bitchy and irritable mood. It happens. Doesn’t last long and I really don’t want to analyze where it came from, too deep.