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I recently read a post about resenting the loss of someone. A day or so ago, I realized that all male figures I care about in my life… Leave for some reason or another.

I can’t hold onto a positive male relationship. I’ve tried and have failed. Is something wrong with me? Am so beyond loving that people run from me? I never get an answer as to what I did wrong. So I have no clue.

Maybe I just make wrong choices. That’s true in one instance.

Why even attempt to find someone when all they do is leave you. And make you feel worse than before they were in your life.

Maybe I’m destine for the love of all times. Maybe I’m suppose to be barren and alone.

That’s the way I feel. That’s the way it looks.

Every attempt at normalcy is thwarted. I really don’t understand why life is so shitty at times. I guess it wouldn’t be called ‘life’ if we didn’t ride this roller coaster.

But eventually the ride stops. I guess that’s when your dead. Not that I’m suicidal.

It’s just that I’m tired of ’emptiness’.

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