I think this heightened anxiety is gonna be the end of me. Xanax, at my dosage can only do so much. I really don’t want to, but I think I’m gonna have to raise it. That or the Zoloft.

I can feel the anxiety under my skin on my back. I’m doing stupid things and bugging people who want nothing to do with me. It’s getting kinda bad. I’m so sorry when I give in and write or call him. I know I’m a pest. But right now, I can’t help myself. I need to stop.

If he would just flat out reject me. I could move on. But I think he doesn’t want to hurt my feelings. I don’t know what is going on with him. It’s been so long.

Far from normal today. Need sleep. I need a phone call. A distraction. Something.

Gonna put some music on and TRY to ease it down some. So very irritable. Wanna yell at someone. Ugh. For no reason.

I just need some support…